I feel like I've just been picked up by a tornado and dropped in a completely different world. Why is this a bad analogy, you may ask? Well, ladies and gentlemen of the internets...we're moving to Oklahoma! Why the fuck would you do that, you ask? Why the fuck, indeed.
The reason is simple enough. The company that Doombot and I work for is expanding our division and adding an office in Oklahoma City. I've been asked to run it, and Doombot is going to (gulp.) work for me. Sounds simple doesn't it? Well, it's not.
There's a house to be bought, and a house to be sold. A daycare to be cancelled,and a daycare to be started. Travel for the three of us back and forth to OKC two weeks ago. Travel back and forth to Virginia weekly for three weeks for Doombot. Orion and I heading to OKC for three days next week. Pet shippers, pet shots, and two different boarding kennels. Crates to buy, furniture to acquire, paint colors to choose. Ice maker un-hooker-uppers and hooker-uppers to schedule. Packers, movers, car shippers. Rental cars, hotels. Oh, and an entirely new job to begin for both of us. Does that sound like a lot? Keep in mind that when I last posted on July 10th I knew nothing about this, and I'll have closed on my house and started work at the new place.
I need a drink. In the mean time, enjoy a photo tour of our new house in OKC!
http://www.jeffclickhomes.com/gallery/swf/310
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Wrong Seven Hours
The squirrel screamed through his appointment with the GI specialist yesterday. We'd been warned off about Dr. Monorail's shitty bedside manner and instead rescheduled with a very nice lady doctor. She was so amazingly sweet and pretty that I can't even think of a clever nickname for her. Anywho, she gave us some tips on dosing the Prevacid and ordered a swallow scan to see if he is aspirating formula as he eats. I'm pretty sure he is, on account of the fact that I can hear and feel the fluid rattling around in his chest after each feeding. I didn't even know this was a possibility until I talked to Melissa's friend Sandy. But, I'll be damned, there it is.
Dr. Sweetnpretty (I will not be denied!) said that it was usually just a matter of getting the formula thick enough so that it isn't aspirated. Now, we've done experiments with thickening Orion's feeds before but never under the current circumstances. Before, he was on breastmilk that was already upsetting his tummy and was not used to having to push out a poop that had any body to it at all. At this point, I think his digestive situation is pretty different. Just think, he's probably only a month away from being ready to eat from a spoon. My baby! With a spoon!
So, last night before bed I prepared his bottle with some rice cereal. This time, I blended it up in the Magic Bullet and added enough to actually make an impact in the viscosity. That amounted to two tablespoons in five ounces. It seemed like a lot, but he was still able to drink it down through a stage two nipple in about 20 minutes so it couldn't have been that bad. He even took another two ounces of non-riced formula to top it off. Then, per usual, he nodded off to sleep at 9pm.
When I laid down for bed at 11pm, I started worrying about the possibility of constipation. I was able to make myself feel a little better about the fact that it's a lot easier to treat the constipation from the rice than the pneumonia from the formula in his lungs. Then I went to bed attempting to apply The Secret to the procedings just in case. Over and over again I repeated "Sleep through the night, painless digestion" as I went to sleep myself.
When the little waking squirrel wimpers woke me up, I looked at the clock. A quick count on my fingers showed that he'd been down for (Holy Shit!) seven hours. He'd never done more than four before without having screamed himself exhausted for half a day first. I was simultaneously overwhelmingly thrilled and bitterly dissapointed. This mythical seven hours of sleep had allowed me to reach the blissful waking hour of (gulp) 4am.
At this point, I was too scared of the constipation issue to give him another rice bottle. I decided that I want to see him poop before he gets more and that for the first few days we'll only do the overnight bottle with rice. So, he had a regular one and wheezed milk for the next three hours until it was time to get up. At which point, I woke up and he kept sleeping while the rest of the house got ready for work. I think someone slipped NyQuil in the rice cereal. He woke up smiling and laughing when I put him in the carseat. I could get used to this.
We still haven't seen a poop, so I don't know if the second part of the "Secret" juju I laid on him worked or not. I guess we'll find out when we get home from work. Just in case, I'll be coming prepared with Karo Syrup and apple juice to get the tracks moving. Party at my house! There will be Vaseline covered Q-Tips for everyone!
Dr. Sweetnpretty (I will not be denied!) said that it was usually just a matter of getting the formula thick enough so that it isn't aspirated. Now, we've done experiments with thickening Orion's feeds before but never under the current circumstances. Before, he was on breastmilk that was already upsetting his tummy and was not used to having to push out a poop that had any body to it at all. At this point, I think his digestive situation is pretty different. Just think, he's probably only a month away from being ready to eat from a spoon. My baby! With a spoon!
So, last night before bed I prepared his bottle with some rice cereal. This time, I blended it up in the Magic Bullet and added enough to actually make an impact in the viscosity. That amounted to two tablespoons in five ounces. It seemed like a lot, but he was still able to drink it down through a stage two nipple in about 20 minutes so it couldn't have been that bad. He even took another two ounces of non-riced formula to top it off. Then, per usual, he nodded off to sleep at 9pm.
When I laid down for bed at 11pm, I started worrying about the possibility of constipation. I was able to make myself feel a little better about the fact that it's a lot easier to treat the constipation from the rice than the pneumonia from the formula in his lungs. Then I went to bed attempting to apply The Secret to the procedings just in case. Over and over again I repeated "Sleep through the night, painless digestion" as I went to sleep myself.
When the little waking squirrel wimpers woke me up, I looked at the clock. A quick count on my fingers showed that he'd been down for (Holy Shit!) seven hours. He'd never done more than four before without having screamed himself exhausted for half a day first. I was simultaneously overwhelmingly thrilled and bitterly dissapointed. This mythical seven hours of sleep had allowed me to reach the blissful waking hour of (gulp) 4am.
At this point, I was too scared of the constipation issue to give him another rice bottle. I decided that I want to see him poop before he gets more and that for the first few days we'll only do the overnight bottle with rice. So, he had a regular one and wheezed milk for the next three hours until it was time to get up. At which point, I woke up and he kept sleeping while the rest of the house got ready for work. I think someone slipped NyQuil in the rice cereal. He woke up smiling and laughing when I put him in the carseat. I could get used to this.
We still haven't seen a poop, so I don't know if the second part of the "Secret" juju I laid on him worked or not. I guess we'll find out when we get home from work. Just in case, I'll be coming prepared with Karo Syrup and apple juice to get the tracks moving. Party at my house! There will be Vaseline covered Q-Tips for everyone!
Monday, June 30, 2008
Stop Hitting Yourself!
Sometime in the last week Orion has discovered that he has limbs. So now, like any kid with a new toy, he wants to play with them non-stop.
Of course, there's the regular squirming, kicking, and arm waving. We had to run out and get him one of those floor gym thingees on the fly Saturday because the poor guy needed something to make him look like the spastic movements had a purpose. You would have thought he'd won the Nobel Prize or lifted the Stanley Cup with how proud I was when he managed to bonk the ball hanging from the plastic kitten to make the music play.
However my favorite new maneuver by far, is the Reverse Kung Fu Chop. Out of nowhere, his little baby brain will send an impulse to his little baby right arm which has heretofore been hanging limply to his side. This causes he right arm tosnap indescriminately into the air with all the force his little Micheline Man bicep can muster. Without fail, this results in him smacking himself in the forehead. I'll have to get a video up, because that' shit is awesome.
Of course, there's the regular squirming, kicking, and arm waving. We had to run out and get him one of those floor gym thingees on the fly Saturday because the poor guy needed something to make him look like the spastic movements had a purpose. You would have thought he'd won the Nobel Prize or lifted the Stanley Cup with how proud I was when he managed to bonk the ball hanging from the plastic kitten to make the music play.
However my favorite new maneuver by far, is the Reverse Kung Fu Chop. Out of nowhere, his little baby brain will send an impulse to his little baby right arm which has heretofore been hanging limply to his side. This causes he right arm tosnap indescriminately into the air with all the force his little Micheline Man bicep can muster. Without fail, this results in him smacking himself in the forehead. I'll have to get a video up, because that' shit is awesome.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
In the Eyes of a Boy
I don't get too sappy around here. I just assume that anyone reading this knows that I love my boy beyond anything I imagined. Sometimes when I'm covered in puke and changing diapers full of blue poop at 4am, I do forget how much I wanted him and how lucky I am that he's finally here. So I wanted to say it. Today and always, I love my son.
A New Day Has Come
I was waiting for so long
For a miracle to come
Everyone told me to be strong
Hold on and don't shed a tear
Through the darkness and good times
I knew I'd make it through
And the world thought I had it all
But I was waiting for you
Hush, love
I see a light in the sky
Oh, it's almost blinding me
I can't believe
I've been touched by an angel with love
Let the rain come down and wash away my tears
Let it fill my soul and drown my fears
Let it shatter the walls for a new, new sun
A new day has...come
Where it was dark now there's light
Where there was pain now there's joy
Where there was weakness, I found my strength
All in the eyes of a boy
Hush, love
I see a light in the sky
Oh, it's almost blinding me
I can't believe
I've been touched by an angel with love
Let the rain come down and wash away my tears
Let it fill my soul and drown my fears
Let it shatter the walls for a new, new sun
A new day has...come
A new day has...come
Ohhh, a light... OOh
A New Day Has Come
I was waiting for so long
For a miracle to come
Everyone told me to be strong
Hold on and don't shed a tear
Through the darkness and good times
I knew I'd make it through
And the world thought I had it all
But I was waiting for you
Hush, love
I see a light in the sky
Oh, it's almost blinding me
I can't believe
I've been touched by an angel with love
Let the rain come down and wash away my tears
Let it fill my soul and drown my fears
Let it shatter the walls for a new, new sun
A new day has...come
Where it was dark now there's light
Where there was pain now there's joy
Where there was weakness, I found my strength
All in the eyes of a boy
Hush, love
I see a light in the sky
Oh, it's almost blinding me
I can't believe
I've been touched by an angel with love
Let the rain come down and wash away my tears
Let it fill my soul and drown my fears
Let it shatter the walls for a new, new sun
A new day has...come
A new day has...come
Ohhh, a light... OOh
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Under Pressure
Getting my boobs out of the milk business has proven to be one of the most difficult and painful parts of the whole baby-making experience. At least with my pelvic pain and swelling during pregnancy I was fine unless I moved. Same with my surgical pain. Plus, for both of those I was given a handy stash of narcotics. This boob thing is nuts.
None of the methods I've heard of to decrease my production are working. I honestly think that most of these methods are designed for girls who are making about an ounce an hour. I'm making more like three ounces an hour. While Righty is playing ball, my left boob is just getting larger and larger. About an hour ago I decided to throw caution to the wind and went to pump just a little bit to kill the worst of the pain. Right there in the file room of work I moved aside the flap of my nursing bra and hosed down the cooler the HR department uses for their pot-lucks. Seriously, my boob was spraying like the fucking Bellagio fountain under it's own pressure. I aborted my plan to pump, and instead just held the little bottle and let my boob deflate itself. People, this is insane.
The only new advice I received in the last 24 hours was to see if I could get on the pill since that's supposed to reduce supply. I was thwarted yesterday, and decided to call and throw myself upon the mercy of my gyno to try to get a prescription in advance of my appointment in mid-July. He was on vacation, but the nurse offered to ask him when he called to check in. The answer wasn't just "no". The answer was "never". It turns out that due to my Factor XII deficiency and history of blood clots, I am no longer a candidate for the pill OR an IUD (which I previously planned).
I'd already been thinking about it, but now I'm pretty sure I'm going to get my tubes tied. I hated the back nine of my pregnancy, and I don't even want any more kids. The squirrel is awesome and I wouldn't trade him for anything, but I don't plan to go through these newborn days and nights again.
Another thing I don't plan to go through again? Getting my milk to dry up. This seriously sucks. It's like the body's last big "fuck you" of giving birth. I'm starting to feel like I'm not any closer to being milk free than I was two days ago. I'm sure I'm pumping too much too often, but the pain is intense and I'm a wimp.
None of the methods I've heard of to decrease my production are working. I honestly think that most of these methods are designed for girls who are making about an ounce an hour. I'm making more like three ounces an hour. While Righty is playing ball, my left boob is just getting larger and larger. About an hour ago I decided to throw caution to the wind and went to pump just a little bit to kill the worst of the pain. Right there in the file room of work I moved aside the flap of my nursing bra and hosed down the cooler the HR department uses for their pot-lucks. Seriously, my boob was spraying like the fucking Bellagio fountain under it's own pressure. I aborted my plan to pump, and instead just held the little bottle and let my boob deflate itself. People, this is insane.
The only new advice I received in the last 24 hours was to see if I could get on the pill since that's supposed to reduce supply. I was thwarted yesterday, and decided to call and throw myself upon the mercy of my gyno to try to get a prescription in advance of my appointment in mid-July. He was on vacation, but the nurse offered to ask him when he called to check in. The answer wasn't just "no". The answer was "never". It turns out that due to my Factor XII deficiency and history of blood clots, I am no longer a candidate for the pill OR an IUD (which I previously planned).
I'd already been thinking about it, but now I'm pretty sure I'm going to get my tubes tied. I hated the back nine of my pregnancy, and I don't even want any more kids. The squirrel is awesome and I wouldn't trade him for anything, but I don't plan to go through these newborn days and nights again.
Another thing I don't plan to go through again? Getting my milk to dry up. This seriously sucks. It's like the body's last big "fuck you" of giving birth. I'm starting to feel like I'm not any closer to being milk free than I was two days ago. I'm sure I'm pumping too much too often, but the pain is intense and I'm a wimp.
Monday, June 23, 2008
We learned a couple of things over the weekend. First, Orion can poop out Nestle Good Start just fine as long as it doesn't have rice ceral in it. Second, Orion doesn't spit up Nestle Good Start as long as it has rice cereal in it.
That's just the kind of weekend it's been. We'll try oatmeal next. If Dr. Google can be trusted it will thicken the formula but not cause constipation. We'll see.
We also got a pretty crappy recommendation on Dr. Monorail. Evidently he provided pretty shoddy care to a friend of a friend, and was a dick about it to boot. We were over visiting the Gaxes (Melissa and Jeff) and since we were having so much fun, the visit ran longer than expected which required more formula. Doombot went all cheap ass on me at Babies R Us and made me feed the squirrel some breast milk, which he immediately refluxed. Bad.
Melissa picked up the phone and called Sandy, who proceeded to scare the shit out of me. I did learn about the oatmeal option and Dr. Monorail's people skills, but I also learned about how bad this could get. As it turns out, Sandy's baby also had laryngomalacia. The tests they did to diagnose the cause of the reflux showed that her baby was actually aspirating formula because of the weakness in the epiglottis. What tipped them off? The same nasty congested sound that Orion makes when he finishes eating. The solution? First, an NG tube that the baby kept pulling out and then whatever god-forsaken tube they actually put straight into their stomach. So now I sit and wait for my appointment knowing that I may end up having to tube feed my little guy. I don't know if my daycare will even accept him like that. I wonder if it would even help? Frankly, I'm so terrified, I'm not even talking about it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Instead, I'm talking about my boobs non-stop to anyone who will slow down long enough. With all signs pointing to successful formula deployment, I've started the weaning process. I don't have a baby to wean. No, I have to wean my Medela Pump-in-Style and that is one greedy bitch. It's actually kind of funny, because when I decided that we would move to formula I was pumping every four hours or so and getting five to six ounces. But once the girls discovered they were being put out to pasture, they've started working overtime. Suddenly I'm fully engorged after about an hour and a half and yeilding about 11 ounces, that's going straight down the drain.
Things are starting to get somewhat better except for the occasional hard knot that keeps cropping up. I owe what little relief I am getting to the sage and peppermint essential oils I'm taking along with as much sudafed as I can stomach. It's been five hours now since I pumped and I'd be doing fine (ish) except for a hard knot on the top of my right breast that I'm dealing with by applying a cold compress. By "cold compress" I mean that I have a can of Caffeine Free Diet Coke shoved in my bra.
Gimme a break. I'm desprate.
That's just the kind of weekend it's been. We'll try oatmeal next. If Dr. Google can be trusted it will thicken the formula but not cause constipation. We'll see.
We also got a pretty crappy recommendation on Dr. Monorail. Evidently he provided pretty shoddy care to a friend of a friend, and was a dick about it to boot. We were over visiting the Gaxes (Melissa and Jeff) and since we were having so much fun, the visit ran longer than expected which required more formula. Doombot went all cheap ass on me at Babies R Us and made me feed the squirrel some breast milk, which he immediately refluxed. Bad.
Melissa picked up the phone and called Sandy, who proceeded to scare the shit out of me. I did learn about the oatmeal option and Dr. Monorail's people skills, but I also learned about how bad this could get. As it turns out, Sandy's baby also had laryngomalacia. The tests they did to diagnose the cause of the reflux showed that her baby was actually aspirating formula because of the weakness in the epiglottis. What tipped them off? The same nasty congested sound that Orion makes when he finishes eating. The solution? First, an NG tube that the baby kept pulling out and then whatever god-forsaken tube they actually put straight into their stomach. So now I sit and wait for my appointment knowing that I may end up having to tube feed my little guy. I don't know if my daycare will even accept him like that. I wonder if it would even help? Frankly, I'm so terrified, I'm not even talking about it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Instead, I'm talking about my boobs non-stop to anyone who will slow down long enough. With all signs pointing to successful formula deployment, I've started the weaning process. I don't have a baby to wean. No, I have to wean my Medela Pump-in-Style and that is one greedy bitch. It's actually kind of funny, because when I decided that we would move to formula I was pumping every four hours or so and getting five to six ounces. But once the girls discovered they were being put out to pasture, they've started working overtime. Suddenly I'm fully engorged after about an hour and a half and yeilding about 11 ounces, that's going straight down the drain.
Things are starting to get somewhat better except for the occasional hard knot that keeps cropping up. I owe what little relief I am getting to the sage and peppermint essential oils I'm taking along with as much sudafed as I can stomach. It's been five hours now since I pumped and I'd be doing fine (ish) except for a hard knot on the top of my right breast that I'm dealing with by applying a cold compress. By "cold compress" I mean that I have a can of Caffeine Free Diet Coke shoved in my bra.
Gimme a break. I'm desprate.
Friday, June 20, 2008
Please Stand Clear of the Doors
Orion is not a happy guy. Over the past couple of weeks things have gone steadily downhill in terms of his gastric comfort. His reflux started breaking through the laughably low dose of Prevacid he's on and he started pooping this toxic orange mucousy stuff. Tons of it. I think the poop problem most likely has to do with the obscene number of Reeses Peanut Butter Cups I've been mainlining for the past month. Obviously he's allergic to something, but what? Is it the peanut butter? The milk? The chocolate?
The solution we came up with is to try to switch him to formula once and for all. I did some research and figured out that the best balance of "unlikely to cause an allergic reaction" and "unlikely to make him constipated" is Nestle Good Start. After just half a day of making bottles with half breastmilk and half formula, his poop was back to normal. The gas, however was plentiful and frightning. The reflux, remains terrible. The baby, miserable.
We called Dr. Crazypants about it to try to get a referral to a pediatric GI doc. At first the nurse was all offended and like, "Dr. Crazypants usually deals with this himself." So we said, "Fine. If it's gonna be like that, here's his symtpoms." She said she'd talk to the good doctor and call us back. When she called, it was with a referral to a pediatric GI doc. That's what I thought, bitches.
So on July 2, we'll take him over to Tampa to meet with a very experienced Pediatric Gastroenterologist who looks like Opie and has this as part of his bio:
Dr. Kaiser also has ties with both the Walt Disney and Anheuser Busch Entertainment Corporations serving as an entertainer and voice over artist for commonly heard recordings such as the monorail.
So, essentially, I'm trusting my little boy's thorax to this guy:
The solution we came up with is to try to switch him to formula once and for all. I did some research and figured out that the best balance of "unlikely to cause an allergic reaction" and "unlikely to make him constipated" is Nestle Good Start. After just half a day of making bottles with half breastmilk and half formula, his poop was back to normal. The gas, however was plentiful and frightning. The reflux, remains terrible. The baby, miserable.
We called Dr. Crazypants about it to try to get a referral to a pediatric GI doc. At first the nurse was all offended and like, "Dr. Crazypants usually deals with this himself." So we said, "Fine. If it's gonna be like that, here's his symtpoms." She said she'd talk to the good doctor and call us back. When she called, it was with a referral to a pediatric GI doc. That's what I thought, bitches.
So on July 2, we'll take him over to Tampa to meet with a very experienced Pediatric Gastroenterologist who looks like Opie and has this as part of his bio:
Dr. Kaiser also has ties with both the Walt Disney and Anheuser Busch Entertainment Corporations serving as an entertainer and voice over artist for commonly heard recordings such as the monorail.
So, essentially, I'm trusting my little boy's thorax to this guy:
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)